@tanya natalynn
While I am sitting here with my morning coffee listening to the sounds of the town coming to life–the car engines kicking in, the trains rumbling by, the distant, haunting sounds of sirens–I'm struggling through some thoughts.
A big part of this blog move has been taking 15 years of fragments and pulling them together into one place so I can never lose them again. A side effect of this effort is mulling over all the things I've lost along the way... and beyond things, the people I've lost.
And I truly mean lost. I do not know where they are anymore. Either they were part of social platforms they never wanted to leave that I have left behind, or they were in Discord servers I've left and lost all mutual contact with. Some have simply gone dark.
I worry about them. Some more than others, but all of them to at least some degree. I think about tracking them down. I could certainly do so in a few cases. But should I? Would me intruding into their lives after such an absence do either of us any good?
This is something I struggle with. The idea that I can't hold on to everyone I've ever met indefinitely. That we only really stay close to a small handful of people until we reach our ends.
I think I should value each interaction I have with everyone more, stop treating each relationship as some eternal well I can return to whenever I desire.
That's it. If you're somebody I know, and you're reading this, I treasure you. I hope we get to spend many years together, but if we don't, know that I have and will continue to treasure the time we do spend with each other.
#coffeethoughts #peoplemattermost
posted on 12/3/2025 at 11:09UTC